Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
