You're completely useless in the revolution.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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