I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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