I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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