Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
