Im at strip club and am horny
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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