I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
