Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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