if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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