So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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