he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Your penis caused this!
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