He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
What a dumb baby whore.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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