This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
handjob tips. give me some.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
try to milk me bitch
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
