so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
