Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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