I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
my sisters under your porch take her home
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
