Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize