Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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