He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize