this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize