I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
