i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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