i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize