I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
