what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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