You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize