This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize