whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
