I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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