My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
