Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize