So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
