But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
