To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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