I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
