So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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