I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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