Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
