I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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