If i come over, it means nothing
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
