was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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