no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
