the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
