I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my sisters under your porch take her home
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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