So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize