for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
