She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I wear drunk well.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
