oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Two words: blizzard sex
Randomize
