Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
