She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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